A couple weeks back, I was sitting in my comparative politics class listening to discussion on something political when I had an interesting, slightly inspirational moment. Perhaps I was bored with the discussion, but at some point, someone said the word independence and my mind immediately turned away from the political discussion and to my own life.

One of my younger sisters recently observed that I have always sought my independence, and particularly back when I was a young adult still residing at home, I yearned for the day I would be on my own.

It is true.

I shared a room with my two older brothers for all of my childhood. In addition, our home was filled with with four sisters and my parents. In all, we totaled nine under one small roof. To further complicate my situation, I was the fourth of the seven children. The three siblings above me were always treated as the older, more mature children, and the three that came after me were always the younger, carefully watched out for children. I felt I was left to fend for myself, that I was on my own as the middle child to create whatever destiny I could without assistance. I believe this thinking led me to yearn even more for my independence. After years of sharing, when the older siblings left the home, I finally got my own room. Shortly after, we moved to Kentucky and I had an entire guest house to myself.

I could not have planned my final move to independence better. With my family in California for the summer and me staying in Kentucky to finish earning my Eagle Scout rank, it worked out that I formally moved out of my parent's home the day after my 18th birthday. A few weeks in California later, I was dropped off in Provo for college, my family returned to Kentucky, and I was totally and completely, in my young eyes, independent.

Six years of life lessons have passed, and I now would like to share the profound and ever true thoughts that came to me that day in my political science class. As a young adult, I thought independence was living on your own, making your own way, and not relying on others for your success. It was not until recently that I realized that independence does not mean free from dependence, but rather I submit independence quite literally means in dependence.

To pay my rent, car loan, insurance, and to buy food, clothing, and other goods and services I need to survive, I depend on work.

To work, I depend on an employer who trusts me and values my skills and on customers who seek our business.

To wake up on time, to stay in touch with friends and family who offer love, support, and useful advice, and to fill free time with uplifting entertainment, I depend on the vast technology of the world.

To challenge my mind, to teach me to think and make hard decisions, and to train me in knowledge, I depend on school.

To teach me respect, admiration, and selflessness, I depend on friends.

To truly repent, to draw nearer to God, to learn of virtue, love, peace, and eternity, I depend on Christ.

In this world, we were never meant to be on our own. To us, endless resources have been given for our utilization to find success in this life, and the next. If ever you think that your life is out of order, or you are struggling to find harmony, I challenge you to learn what I have learned; humble yourself, and live in dependence, only then will you truly understand this life.

I recently took up running. It happened by accident. I wanted to get in quasi-shape so when we started playing ultimate frisbee, volleyball, kickball, and all the other sports we play in summer, I would not be huffing and puffing through the first month.

 Corey (from work) and I decided to exercise together the morning before we moved my piano. The exercise ended up being running because he was just beginning training for the Ragnar Relay. The Ragnar is a 200-mile team relay from Logan to Park City. Teams have either six or twelve members.

I do not run. I have not run since 5Ks in high school over 8 years ago and I did not train for those at all. I just showed up, ran them, ate free food and went home with a shirt. I am not a runner. In case you are not picking up what I am putting down, I have never been a runner. Ever. Yet, I ran. Not only that, but about a mile into the run, I asked about Ragnar, was invited to join the team, and without a moment of hesitation, I said yes. One mile of formal running in 23 years of life and I was committing to a serious, grueling race through the mountains. I have not regretted my decision for a moment. I agreed so quickly because somehow it felt really right.

You see, this year I have been on a mission to become the person I want to be and the person I think I was sent here to be. I have spent a lot of time rolling with the punches. I learned loads to be sure, but I was not as in control of my life as I should have been. I made money and I spent money. I gave up investments in my future for immediate fun. I will not be so harsh on myself to say that I was completely wasting time, but I was pretty caught up in things and while I was doing some things right, I could have been doing them more right.

Many of you have read of my struggles and have been a witness to my realization of the responsibilities I have as an adult, a future father, and a priesthood holder. I was not living up to those titles and it pained me. One thing that really scared me was the thought that one day I might be blessed to meet a gentle, loving, and beautiful girl whose attributes and character were of the highest standard and who I would want to court, date, and marry, but upon seeing my house not in order, she would find another who could provide the essential foundation for a joyous eternity. That is not the Jon I know. The Jon I know and the Jon I want to always be is the Jon who defied all odds and earned his Eagle Scout award many years ago. I would like to recount that story for those who are unfamiliar. I do so not in bragging, but because it was an important lesson for me that I have always remembered.

Throughout my adolescence, I was a Boy Scout. Living in Texas, I began my journey to achieve that coveted rank of Eagle Scout. For many years, I earned badges and went on scores of camp-outs. As I progressed in school, scouting became more difficult, but it looked as if I would still easily make Eagle before I was eighteen. Then we moved to Kentucky, where scouting was not quite as easy. If I remember correctly, when we moved, with one full year of time left, only 3 incomplete merit badges and a service project remained. Some of the requirements were time sensitive and it was imperative that I work on them months before the birthday deadline. I slowly worked through them, begrudgingly at times. To complicate things even more, my father had been working in California for a few months and when school ended, just two months before the age deadline, the rest of the family packed up to spend the summer in the California desert with him. With college to prepare for, I had the choice of moving with them or staying behind to finish my Scouting work. Feeling quite independent and ready to be on my own, I opted to stay. With that decision, it became entirely up to me to complete the steps to become an Eagle Scout. I lived fifteen miles from the people who could help me finish merit badges and get a project going and I had no car. I lived in my little guest house alone and I made my own schedule. I got a library card and checked out the limit of six movies per day and watched all six through the afternoon, evening, and night, then return them and get six more the next day. I would walk the couple miles to Wal-Mart to get snacks. I was living the high life and no one could say or do anything to change that. I would wager that under similar circumstances, most, if not all seventeen year-old guys would completely neglect finishing their scouting duties, but something in me would not allow me to put it off. I made phone calls, I completed assignments, and put together a service project in which I consulted with an arborist and worked out donations from several local nurseries to re-landscape the church grounds. I completed my project on Saturday, July 14th, had my Eagle Board of Review on Sunday, July 15th, where my new rank of Eagle Scout was proclaimed just hours before I turned eighteen. I had done it. Turns out, even my parents did not think I would get it done. They thought when they moved to California it was over. To be honest, for a moment, so did I. But that something in me changed me.

That same something in me came back this year. It comes back often when I am not doing my best. I have pondered what that something is. At times, I have called it responsibility, as it seems to show up when I have teetered too long on the border of irresponsibility. But I do not think it is just that. I think it is the best of me coming out to remind me of who I am, where I came from, where I am destined to go and who I am meant to be. It is the lessons my parents taught me of honesty, integrity, hard work, love, care, peace, kindness, reverence, respect, patience, dedication, and improvement. It is the lessons God has taught me in humility, faith, virtue, temperance, and charity.

I get a little better each time I try. I hope to one day be my best, but I know that in this life, there is always something for me to be better at.

Our song of the day is one of the coolest motivational songs I know: Chariots of Fire.

I will leave you today with a motto I came up with to live by-

I know that my Redeemer lives.
What comfort this sweet sentence gives!
He lives, he lives, who once was dead.
He lives, my ever-living Head.
He lives to bless me with his love.
He lives to plead for me above.
He lives my hungry soul to feed.
He lives to bless in time of need.

He lives to grant me rich supply.
He lives to guide me with his eye.
He lives to comfort me when faint.
He lives to hear my soul's complaint.
He lives to silence all my fears.
He lives to wipe away my tears.
He lives to calm my troubled heart.
He lives all blessings to impart.

He lives, my kind, wise heav'nly Friend.
He lives and loves me to the end.
He lives, and while he lives, I'll sing.
He lives, my Prophet, Priest, and King.
He lives and grants me daily breath.
He lives, and I shall conquer death.
He lives my mansion to prepare.
He lives to bring me safely there.

He lives! All glory to his name!
He lives, my Savior, still the same.
Oh, sweet the joy this sentence gives:
"I know that my Redeemer lives!"
He lives! All glory to his name!
He lives, my Savior, still the same.
Oh, sweet the joy this sentence gives:
"I know that my Redeemer lives!"

And when I think that God his Son not sparing,
sent him to die, I scarce can take it in,
that on the cross, my burden gladly bearing,
he bled and died, to take away my sin.

I am grateful every day to know that my Lord and Savior, even Jesus Christ, came to Earth and suffered, bled, and died for my sins. For I am a sinner and I would surely be cast into eternal damnation if not for His atoning sacrifice and I fall to my knees daily in humble gratitude for this perfect act.

My friends, He lives, and I know He lives and I proclaim it to all who will hear my words. I know that my Redeemer lives.

We are almost to the point where I can confidently say that spring is fully upon us. The temperatures are soaring into the 60s and the final threats of frost will soon be withdrawn. Rain falls when the skies darken, and snow is naught but a melting memory of months now passed. The sweet fragrance of flowers will catch in the breeze before long, and the bees, spiders, and boxelder bugs are as abundant as the sunshine they are found basking in. The landscape made bare by the harshness of winter is transforming. God's chapel will soon be restored to all its natural glory.

The thawing of the ground brings more changes than the earthly ones. Frisbees are being dusted off, volleyballs, footballs, basketballs, and soccer balls are being pumped up for play. Shorts are being unpacked from storage, t-shirts too. Bikes are tuned up, running shoes are purchased, BBQs are uncovered, sunscreen becomes a staple.

Yes, the beginning of the outdoor season has come. In this season, friendships are strengthened, life lessons are learned, and tranquility is achieved.

I just finished my workout routine that accompanies my running program.The Insanity Workout.

I made it through and was halfway through the cool-down stretches when I gave in to my body's demands and collapsed to the floor. My heart was not doing the usual *thump-thump*. It was more like one, steady *thuuuuuu*, as if it were yelling out "WHYYYYYYYYY".

I laid helplessly on the floor for a half hour. I was only able to move my left thumb and forefinger and I could only open my left eye for a few seconds at a time. Exhaustion is an understatement. And it was actually literally 30 minutes I laid there without moving.

Hindsight is 20/20 and I probably should not have started working out for another day or so. I have been battling a slight head cold that has caused some periodic lightheadedness just being on my feet all day at work. Nothing serious, but my body is probably only at 75% from fighting it. I have got to work on my stubbornness. I like pushing myself to extremes, but too often I do so in unhealthy situations like this for no reason other than my own refusal to accept that I am mortal.

Insanity is the devil. We'll see if I choose to stick with it or adopt a lesser program to get me into shape for my race and then try it again later. I'm in this to be healthier and challenge myself more, but I am undecided on whether Insanity is the best approach for my goals right now.

 I have to go either harvest all this salt on my body and clothes or shower it off now. And I'm still unsure if I wet myself or if it's sweat...

Exercise...what was I thinking...

Song of the Day is the Funeral March :)

Every day people go through life unhappy, or, more likely, not as happy as they could be or want to be. The only question I have for those of you who may be in this situation is: Why? What is keeping you from your happiness?

I have no degree in psychology. I have no experience in therapy. I have no formal training in any field that qualifies me to make any sort of medically acceptable recommendations for you. What I do have, however, is an extremely happy mind and soul that a few months ago was as down and dreary as a downpour on the darkest night. And now, my happiness increases every day and my life gets better, and I would be selfish and it would be wrong if I did not share a little of my experiences with those who will hear me.

The absolute first thing you must understand is that you and you alone control your life. Debts may burden you, consequences of wrong actions may trouble and hurt you, bad friends may make it tough to choose the right decisions, but you and you alone control your life.

Once you truly understand your control of your life, you have to know that you are not alone. You are the decision maker of your life, but you have a loving Father in Heaven who will not forsake you. If you seek Him, He will help you. Do not expect Him to solve your problems overnight. You are here to learn and to grow, to make mistakes, to be wrong, to experience pain, to be weak. But you will be made strong if you do the things He has asked you to do. Go to church, kneel in prayer, humbly read the scriptures, sacrifice your tithing, fast for guidance, give service to others, be honest. The world will offer you little peace and there is no solace in unclean places. Create an atmosphere pleasing to God and seek His help and you will receive it.

Once you have grasped these foundational principles, then you can really begin to work on the individual problems that are robbing you of your happiness. If debts are your problem, you will find the strength to cut expenses you once felt necessary and to give up luxuries you can do without. You will find that creating a budget is easier and your resolve to strictly adhere to it will be greatly increased. If bad friends are your problem, new friends will literally appear out of nowhere. Learn from them and grow with them. Every person we know has something we can learn, even if it is attributes we do not want to have.

I promise that if you are unhappy in life and you go back to the essential principles of owning your life and living it according to the way God, who gave you everything you had, have and ever will have, asked, NO problem will ever be so great that you cannot overcome it.

Happiness knows no bounds. It is possible that your happiness can increase every day for the rest of your life and beyond. Never settle for less than you are worth, and we are all worth an eternity of happiness.

I have a blog that people read,
I post it to my Facebook feed.
I write of life, the good and bad,
of times I'm happy and times I'm sad.

I write the lessons I have learned,
the many chapters I have turned.
I share with all who care to hear,
the tales of how I beat my fear.

I also write of silly things,
of laughter and the joy it brings.
I hope to make my readers smile,
we all need to once in a while.

On Sundays, I share words of choice,
with music that brings heavens voice.
For God sent us his only Son,
and His message is for everyone.

Occasionally, I'll have a rant,
I try to suppress them, but usually can't.
Things like acronyms and grammar,
I come out swinging with my hammer.

I write these things not just for me,
I write them very publicly.
You people read, and like it too,
I don't deserve so much from you.

And so today I write this post,
to the people I appreciate most.
I thank you for your readership,
and with this poem to you, my hat I tip.

As previously noted, I am working to eliminate my debts so I can begin investing my money and putting money away for retirement. The sooner I do that, the better.

I still have a long, long way to go, but I have done a few things to save money I thought I would share.

Firstly, if that is even a word, I finally decided to permanently quit paying someone to cut my hair. Last summer we shaved our heads, but that was for funsies more than saving money. I do not know much about cutting hair, but I have a length I like that I buzz it to now and I have a roommate clean up the neck, though I think I need a more competent person doing that as the roommate I had help this time left me bleeding and bruised, literally, all over. He pretty much jabbed the attachment-less buzzer at me, not realizing that sharp, pointy metal objects are not gentle. Thankfully it has almost all healed now.

Nummer zwei (that means number 2, in German), now that the weather is warming up, I will wash my car by hand. Rather than paying $8-$10 per wash, and I wash my car at least twice a month in summer, I'll be paying only for the cost of soap, which I have not yet bought because I have not researched the best options yet. It will be almost 50 degrees this week though, so I will get on that ASAP (look there, I used an acronym...but it's a nostalgic, cool acronym, not a lazy, pointless, worthless acronym such like unto the ones we find today).

Tres lechesly (now I know that is not a word, but I love Tres Leches), I own a lot of stuff. Not much is worth selling, if anything, but I do have one or two items I do not need or use that I can sell that would bring in a small sum of cash.

The number of parts of a whole quartered and added with a "th" and "ly"(that's fourthly, for those who are as confused as I), a penny saved is a penny earned. I have always collected spare change on a small scale both in my car and in my Korean pig piggy bank in my room. Generally, when the pig becomes full, I take it to a coin machine, collect about $15-$20 and deposit it into my account. The change in my car usually buys me a couple McDoubles when I'm craving them. However, I will be upgrading my coin-saving operations to save for the long-term. I have a large, plastic jar I would like to fill. That jar is not to be touched until it is full, at which time I will get an even larger container for my coins. I will save every coin I get as change, as well as every coin I find on the ground.

Those are the main things I am doing, aside from limiting my expenditures and working to reduce my cost of living. I generally have to drive to work due to the cold, dark, and lack of public transport at the early hours I work, but if I ever work later and can take the free public bus that stops not a half block from here and would get me within walking distance of work, I will do that. I have a bike but it is in dismal shape and may be dead now. I did pay a required student fee as part of tuition where I can rent a bike for three months if one is available. I can cook on the rare occasions I have company over, so there is little need to go spend money on the plethora of sub-par restaurants in town.

Having a car is a huge blessing, but having the one I have is also a thorn in my side. I enjoy imagining having an extra $406 to pay off debts and invest in my future, but I know in the end I need the car. I just have to keep it healthy.

It is Sunday, so our Song of the Day is an uplifting one. Whether working to achieve financial stability or trying to find peace and solace in the busy world, I can personally attest that only the fool tries to do it alone. We need help from our Heavenly Father, the heavenly hosts of angels, and the atoning sacrifice of our Savior and Redeemer Jesus Christ. Our Song of the Day is "I Need Thee Every Hour" sung by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir.

If you know me very well, you probably know that I get around to doing what I am best suited for at my own pace. People tell me time and time again I should do this or I should do that. Even more people think it to themselves, and then, one day, I come to the realization that I ought to try that thing and everyone says, "It's about time you started doing that!! We thought you should have gone into that forever ago!"

So...lay it on me. You've all said I had talent in writing for years and pushed and shoved me towards writing opportunities, but beyond my private writings (mostly witty poetry), school papers, and this blog, I never tried. Now, as I mentioned before, I will be writing for the University Catering blog. When I announced it before though, it was a limited role, and now, after some meetings and lots of thought, I have agreed to be entirely responsible for all content on the blog. This week I am revamping the look and my first post will likely come Friday, with weekly posts coming each Wednesday. I see the catering blog as a valuable marketing tool that provides entertainment as well as information. I expect two kinds of people to read it. First, those with a vested interest in it, such as some of you who will undoubtedly want to see what I write and also some people on campus with an interest in catering. Second, those who happen upon it either because they want to know more about catering, because they are interested in using our services, or those who happen upon it by accident and click around to read things they may find interesting. No matter who sees the blog, the goal is to have enough content on there that they get to know who University Catering is, and hopefully they will remember that so if one day they or someone they know does need some catering, they will come to us. I am excited to build our blog. I have always had an interest in marketing, but I have no formal experience and these days, no experience means essentially no opportunity. Who knew that experience in a personal blog would translate to venturing into the world of marketing!

That is basically the only exciting news I have. I did go to the library and now have a library card so I can continue reading without having to buy books. Currently, I am reading a book called "Living Your Life for Half the Price". Next up are some political biographies and Utah history books. I have also been re-reading the Book of Mormon and on Sunday I finished 2nd Nephi, Jacob, Enos, Jarom, Omni, and the Words of Mormon. This week I will get to Alma. Sundays are my main reading days as I have chosen to keep my Sundays free of all housework, homework, and really most any work. Most weekdays, I usually manage a half hour to an hour of reading before bed as well, and because I work between 6 and 7 every day, bedtime is no later than 11, but usually by 10-10:30.

The weather has finally been sunny and we had a few temperatures up in the mid to upper 30s and some rain. I chuckle at the people talking of spring, because spring doesn't really come until mid-April. Expect a couple more significant snowstorms before things stay warm. But, don't forget that THIS SUNDAY, our clocks "spring forward" an hour.

Alright, I'm back to rambling so it is time to split. Look for a new post here Friday that will announce my first post on the catering blog.

Song of the Day is an instrumental version of "Sail" by Awolnation. I chose instrumental because that's the catchy part. The lyrics make no sense to me. Though be warned, as I'm sure you realized since you are already at the bottom of this post, it's not a full instrumental, they just cut the lyric track minus the "SAIL!" yelling and some "lalalas". I guess they were worried you might not know the name of the song...who can forget now.

First of all, I have to reiterate for the umpteenth time how incredibly perplexing, interesting, yet undeniably humbling it is and how grateful I am that anyone would not only read the seemingly unimportant things I write, but that you all comment on my writing and seem to find it at least mildly appeasing.

My blog began years ago. When I moved to college and was living 1500 miles from home (which was Kentucky at the time), I began a newsletter that I circulated through email to family and a few friends. I created an entire template and each issue was even numbered. Sadly I do not have any surviving copies I can find or I would show a picture of what it was. After doing a newsletter for some time I began a blog. It took my a good year or more to actually do much with it and 2010 was finally the break out year. It was originally just a way to keep family and friends updated on what I was doing. Then it became somewhat of a journal. It has evolved since its inception and now my blog is a place where I talk about all sorts of topics ranging from lessons I've learned to interesting or funny things I saw or heard. I share personal stories of hardship not meant to garner pity, but rather to remind myself of the growth that resulted from my distress and hopefully to inspire someone struggling with similar circumstances. I share political views to get myself and others thinking about how we can better approach tough issues. I also share uplifting and spiritually edifying messages, particularly on Sundays, because above all else, I want people to walk away after reading my blog feeling that in some way, I have been able to influence them in a positive way. Those who read my blog are generally my good friends, and anyone else who reads I consider a friend and I would give all that I am to improve the lives of those I care about.

Now, having said all that, I need to get a little ranting done. The topic of my frustrations will come as no surprise to many...it is acronyms. Not very long ago, acronyms were a novelty. We had ASAP, FYI, TTFN (ta ta for now!), ATM, and other simple acronyms. Then came the SMS, or Short Message Systems. Texting. The beginning of the end of mankind. An incredible tool gone awry. Now we have LOL, ROFL, BTW, BF/GF, BFF, BRB, FWIH, YOLO, TTYL, WTG, OMG, WTH, IDK, IMO/IMHO/JMHO, NSFW, and on and on and on. I hear new ones every day. I just don't get it. I still punctuate my text messages. I capitalize words, use correct spelling, use proper grammar. I can't even abbreviate extra as xtra. I try every time, but every single time, without fail, I shake my head in disgust and write the "e" on the beginning and mutter to myself why the heck I would do such a stupid thing. Is the world in such a hurry I can't even write that one little "e"? I would like to issue a challenge to you acronymizers. Go one week without using a single acronym. See if your life falls apart. It won't. I guarantee it. Use your words guys...

Song of the Day is "ABC" by Michael Jackson.

Holy criminy I have been busy! My poor brain is doing it's best to keep up, hopefully it will make it until my next break, which seems like it will not be until next weekend. A brief synopsis of the past few days. I moved over the weekend. Everything I need to live is here, storage and a few other things still need to be brought over. Sunday, I had a very spiritual and memorable Sabbath. Monday, I left for work at 6:40 and did not return to my house until after school, work, FHE dinner, and curling league. I got home at 9:30 , where I took a quick shower and then had to leave again for a few hours. I got to bed late Monday night around 1:15 and was up for work again at 6. I then worked until just before 5, then I went home and did laundry and was in bed by 9 so I could be up at 4:45 for another long day of work. Tonight, I am taking an evening to myself after I do a spot of homework just so I can rest my brain. I will say that ever since the struggles of chronic fatigue, the importance of rest has been better understood and respected.

Life in general is going well. I am doing very well in school so far this semester. I am hoping to secure enough financial aid to cover next semester without loans and I hope to pay off the small loan I took for the current semester by summer's end. That or try to pay off my car so I can reduce my cost of living by $300 a month. I tell ya, money will stress you out quicker than anything.

Spring is supposed to be approaching but the low was close to zero this morning and this weekend we had another storm dump 4+ inches of snow on us. This global warming thing is unpredictable.

I'm starting to ramble. I had some words of substance to impart but staring at this screen is making me more weary by the minute, so instead I will just depart and I will come back with more in a day or so.

For the Song of the Day, there can only be one today, it has to be "Wake Me Up Before You Go" by Wham, but I just call it "Jitterbug"!! The song has been in my head all day. Here's a little trivia that has nothing to do with this song, but with the term jitterbug. Jitterbug is a type of swing dance that became popular in the 1930s and 40s. The term came around in reference to alcoholics who would get the "jitters" (uncontrolled shaking). Then, dancers started using the term jitterbug to describe swing dancers who would dance out of control. Popular culture pushed that further to just mean all swing dancers, and somehow that came to be a kind of dance now closely associated with the Lindy Hop and East Coast Swing. Another interesting piece of trivia is that at the time jitterbugging was becoming a hit in the 30s and 40s, the Wizard of Oz was being filmed for release in 1939. They filmed a song and dance that was eventually removed called "The Jitterbug". Below is the scene with the actual video footage beginning at the song.

It has long been my belief that if you are not moving forward, you are moving backward. There is very little leveling or stagnation, for if you are content to never change, it does not take long before your contentment leaves you sliding back in your progression.

I have had a very blessed past six months that has found me on a strong upswing, though recently, I felt as if I was beginning to stall. I took a look at where I am in this current chapter of my life and then looked at where I would like to be in the next couple chapters. One thing was absolutely clear. Regardless of what I do next, I need to better position myself to get there. There are steps I need to take to be prepared financially, physically, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally. The wheels are now in motion to achieve my goals.

This weekend, I moved. I now have a room in a four bedroom house about a mile down the road from my old residence. This move will alleviate my finances a fair amount and hopefully growth in other areas will follow. I will be in a new ward at church, which will be an interesting challenge.

I reactivated my Facebook account this weekend as well. However, I pared down my account significantly to reduce the need to frequent the site. Essentially, I want to enjoy the ability to share my blog there and allow other people who no longer see telephones as a means of communication an extra resource for contacting me. My month and a half away has been extremely invigorating. I definitely found far more value in my conversations and associations with friends. It is amazing how much more you can talk about when you have not shared your every thought already. I do not refute that Facebook is a powerful tool, but I irrevocably believe that friendships and relationships built as far outside the virtual realm as humanly possible will always be stronger, more meaningful, and will lead to a real and true happiness that cannot exist online.

Now to venture off topic for a moment, though I suppose this does fit well into the topic of moving forward and change. I am excited to announce that beginning next Wednesday, I will be writing a weekly blog post for the Catering/Dining Services blog "Exceeding Expectations". The management has been chasing me down for over half a year attempting to force me to do it. I hate feeling forced and I was very confused with what they wanted and though I tried several times, I could never come up with anything of substance. Then, somewhat out of the blue, I had an idea, sat down, and the series I will write was born. Here is a little teaser for you:

Food is a fact of life. It is all around us. In our homes, in our workplace, even in our cars; food is always present. Food is more important than you may believe. Aside from the obvious vital nutritional benefits to our bodies, food connects us socially. Think of a time you participated in a social gathering; a wedding, a birthday party, a funeral, a holiday party, a farewell, a business meeting, a conference, an interview, a sporting event, or even a simple day out enjoying nature. Food was likely involved, and even more likely, was a large part of why you attended. As people, we see food as a means of uniting us. If you feed them, they will come.

My name is Jon and I am a Catering Chef for University Catering. I would like to invite you to join me on a journey to see food differently. Throughout this journey, I will introduce you to our entire dining establishment and our staff, who have dedicated their careers to food and the coming together of people it brings. Each week, we will explore a new dining operation on campus and the purpose each place serves. We will meet workers from all walks of life who passionately provide service to loyal customers each day. Together, we will discover how food affects us daily and how Utah State University provides for the culinary demands of an ever changing world.

The series will run through the end of the semester and should be loads of fun. I will be sure to link each post to here for you all.

Our Song of the Day comes from a fantastic movie I always love watching. It is "Keep on the Sunny Side" from the O Brother Where Art Thou? soundtrack. Enjoy and have a great weekend!

I wish I could say my life was all sorted out, I was totally and completely happy and things could not be better, but, if I said that, I would be dead and in heaven and I likely would not need a blog as I would hopefully (fingers crossed) have the ability to will my thoughts to everyone through some awesome form of spirit to spirit telepathy.

I can say, however, that I know where I want to be in life, I am working towards that, I find joy in the small every day things, and life is always getting better. Speaking metaphorically, I am filming my life story, and, as we all do, sometimes I wish I could fast forward a few years past this grindstone part that is young adulthood. I do enjoy the experiences though, because I know that for every challenge I face now, a sweet reward is somewhere in the future.

Really, the main thing that is bothering me is this moving ordeal. I do not mean to make it sound over exaggerated, but almost regardless of what I accomplish, I feel like until I settle this problem, I am completely stagnant. Everything I do or want to do seems to come back to it. I cannot escape it. I feel the need to move, yet the circumstances to do so persist in preventing me from moving. I have exercised nearly every option available to me to no avail. Hopefully, by the end of this month, things will resolve in their own time, otherwise I will be forced to play a hand I truly do not wish to play.

I know I am being just a little enigmatic here, but I do not want to cause a stir about the situation. Word always travels fast and already people are taking sides based on the two differing views on what is occurring with my desire to move.

In a nutshell, the bulk of my reasoning for moving lies in my goals. I have very specific goals I want to achieve by summer's end. Simply put, in ways more than just financially, staying in my present location and environment would greatly hinder my ability to achieve those goals.

Anyway...things are progressing slowly for the time being. On a positive note, my date Friday was terrific and extremely enjoyable.

Song of the Day is one I have enjoyed for a few years now, it is "Keep on Trying" by Poco.

It is that time of year again. I was at the grocery store on this the eve of Valentine's Day and lo and behold, all the last minute shoppers were in their frenzy to get that special something for that special someone. I, as usual, blew past the flowers, the teddy bears, the cards, and the chocolates and gathered the grocery items on my list. I do not pity myself nor do I feel the least bit sad at having my February 14th alone. I find it interesting that so many feel obligated to have a date that night. The social pressures of society have yet again lessened the value of what I think is a wonderful holiday for those who truly love. To all of you with plans with your special someone, and to those of you yet to find that permanent someone who have a temporary one for this year, Happy Valentine's Day.

Oh, and don't worry, I have a date Friday I am looking forward to very, very much :)

At work today, we had a power outage that lasted three hours. I had finished the early morning duties and had just written the long list of tasks remaining for the day when it went dark. In the kitchen, with no windows or sky lights or emergency lights, it was pitch dark. We pulled out our phones for light and went to find out what we could. After a few minutes, we learned eight buildings on campus were part of the outage, which meant it was a more serious problem than someone bumping a switch. With several catering orders to be sent out to areas with power, I had work that needed doing and could not wait. I searched for a flashlight and when I found one, it was back to work. To keep the fridges cool, we got as much as we needed out at one time and waited until we were done with everything to put it all back at the same time. I cut fruit and laid cookies on trays with a lone beam of light illuminating my work space. It was interesting, but I enjoyed the change. I went to my class where the power also was out. There were two emergency lights and windows that enabled us to begin a simplified class, but the power in that building went on after fifteen minutes. We ended early anyway and I expected to go back to work to catch back up in the light. But, it was not so. We continued our work in the dark until finally, at about 11:45, nearly three full hours after it went out, the power was fully restored.

The Piano Guys have a new video out and, as usual, it is phenomenal. I will post it here in lieu of a Song of the Day. Enjoy!

This past week has left me frazzled.

I have been aggressively seeking a suitable replacement for my place on our lease so I can move into a less expensive room in a house. A banking error has left $245.70 floating around somewhere other than my bank account. One of three upcoming tests has been taken in school. These and many daily lesser dealings, all compounded by a slight head cold I've only just overcome and several nights of inadequate sleep have rendered my brain rather useless this weekend.

I need a reboot.

I will say, however, that I am very grateful to be busy. Boredom, or rather, idleness, is something I do not deal well with. I get cabin fever. I lose my mind. I feel useless and worthless and then I buy highly sugarous drinks and foods. I waste the days away in front of the boob tube, watching shows not on History and Discovery that are of legitimate interest, but rather pointless shows I watch simply because they are on and I am there and I have no willpower to do much else.

No, I prefer being frazzled and having worked tirelessly to accomplish my tasks. Only then can I find the sweet solace that lies in my piano. Only then can the words of a book capture my mind and not put me to sleep. Only then can I appreciate each day I have.

Here's to being only slightly less frazzled this weekend.

Song of the Day is "Hip Pickles" by: Blue Lou Marini's band Blood, Sweat and Tears. I actually heard this song done live by ol' Blue Lou himself at a jazz festival in Texas. I figured the interesting introduction and the heavy funk was an appropriate "frazzled" feel for today.

Time has been more abundant since the day I removed my presence from Facebook. The first few days, I seemed to have such endless extra time, I wondered how I would ever fill it all. Slowly, but surely, I have found productive ways to fill the space. I have become more dedicated to my piano, have found time for naps, I have attempted study time (though I am struggling with my focusing on important readings and internalizing information and need to find out why before midterms begin), and I have started reading for leisure again.

Several years ago, my sister worked as a receptionist for the pre-nursing program at BYU. During that time, some conference or lecture or something of the sort came around that I guess they all attended. The speaker had written this book and they all got a copy to read before the conference or lecture or whatever that gathering was. I also lived in Provo and somehow that book ended up in my possession. Fast forward a few years, and this migrating book ended up in the pocket behind the driver's seat of my SUV. Fast forward another year and a half, and, despite having left this book in there deliberately each time I cleaned my car (and I clean it several times a month), the other day I removed it and placed it in my room. With all this time to spare now, I suppose it was only fitting that the a few nights ago I opened it up and began to read.

The book is titled "Wake Up to a Happier Life: Finding Joy in the Work You Do Every Day" by: Amanda Dickson. Those of you who have ever considered me an ornery person (and I think that includes all of you), are likely thrilled at the prospect of me waking up to a happier life. Let me first assure you of this: I will either become the happiest ornery person or the orneriest happy person you know, but I will be both.

Anyway...I wanted to share something that I have sort of learned in life, but when I read it today, having it laid out in an organized way, I gained a deeper understanding of. We are motivated to do everything that we do by one of three feelings. We are motivated by fear, we are motivated by duty, or we are motivated by love. When we do things out of fear, whether it be fear of losing something or someone, fear of failure, etc., we are led to resentment. You will despise doing what you have to do, and despise the thing or person you are doing it for. Doing something out of sense of duty is not a terrible thing, but it often leaves us feeling trapped if we only do it out of duty. The best way to be motivated to action is love. I can personally attest that when we act in love, there is a fullness and completeness and a sweet feeling that accompanies it. You will find yourself fully engaged when you act out of love.

Acting out of love is a goal I have been working hard to achieve. A great example I discovered in myself is school. I did not plan on going back to school anytime soon. Then, one day I had a thought and three days later I applied, was admitted, and enrolled. I thought a lot on what motivated me to go back to school. I told people it was because I figured I needed a degree eventually and I was already here, so why not. That was not entirely true. If you know me, you know I follow the news a lot. I spend on average a few hours a day reading news from around the world. Local news, regional news, national news, international news, odd news, entertainment news, opinions, and more. I have inside of me a very deep desire to learn things. I cannot really explain what specifically I look for in the news, but not unlike my father, I have begun to develop a wide range of knowledge of numerous topics, many of which may seem trivial to some. I enjoy knowing the history of places, particularly the places I live. I enjoy seeing something while I drive and researching it, such as the Bear River Massacre site north of here that I stopped at on the way to Rexburg one day. This coming Tuesday actually marks the 150 year anniversary of the massacre. I am motivated by a love for knowledge. I own a dictionary and thesaurus I look to often. I do crossword puzzles to increase my learning and Scrabble is my favorite board game. I have a book called "The Way Things Work" I flip through to learn basic concepts in the world around me. I am not a huge television watcher, but I do watch a lot of Discovery Channel, History Channel, and other channels with shows that teach me about the world and its history. I love to learn. That love has enabled me to open my mind and to fully engage myself in learning all that I can. I went back to school as a result.

These three motivations apply to every situation you will find yourself in. The only person who can choose how you live is you. You can go to work and spend the day looking over your shoulder for fear of being fired. You can go to work every day out of duty to your family because you need the money. Or, you can go to work every day because you love the opportunity you have today to do that job, to give your talents, to meet and communicate with other great people, and to be able to provide for your loved ones. Tomorrow, you can seek a new job, but it is today, and what lies before you will be there no matter how you choose to approach it.

The final thought I would like to share today from the book concerns change. Change happens in an instant. It occurs the moment your mind is truly made up. Every day you live that change in the decisions you make, but that change happened in an instant.

 I feel that too often we are waiting for people to change when they already have. In our eyes, they are not changed until they have spent a certain amount of time making the decisions that support their change. I know we, myself included, can be judgmental, but I am certainly going to work harder to accept the changes those around me make sooner, to trust in them more.

Our Song of the Day today is "Without You" covered by the always amazing Piano Guys.

We had a rare event occur in Utah today. Well, rare for Utah. In Texas, we saw this phenomenon more frequently.

Freezing rain.

Possibly the most difficult form of precipitation to deal with. Normal rain, no problem, often even enjoyable. Snow, easy; also enjoyable. Mist: cool. Hail: mostly cool (once you get to golf ball size you're at the line of cool, dangerously cool, and deadly (which is still cool)). Freezing rain though? Not fun. It turns the roads to skating rinks. It turns the sidewalks to slip n' slides. It turns your windshield to church-worthy frosted glass displays. You would honestly be better off with a sled, a husky, and a hot dog dangling on a string. The only real good thing I can think of that ever came from freezing rain was a day or two off...but in Utah there is no such thing. Not unless all the power, heat and daylight are gone or angels start harkening in the Second Coming, and even then I do not think we would get time off for our judgement. Anyway...point is, mighty Mother Nature showed off today. The inversion (which is NOT the pollution but rather the warm air that traps the cold air and the pollution) stayed in place when this weak storm hit. The valleys have been trapped with super sub-freezing temperatures for some time now, while the mountains have actually been in the 40s. Thus, when the storm moved in, it was raining in the balmy upper air, but as the rain fell into the unjustly cold valleys, it chilled and froze the moment it touched just about everything. The result was chaos. People here struggle to drive when it is 80 degrees and light cloud cover creates the ideal driving conditions. They really struggle when it gets wet. They are impossible when it is slushy. I can only imagine the mayhem that went on throughout all of northern Utah with ice sheets for roads. I envision some variation of the sport of curling.

On to a more serious matter, the other day I had a most interesting conversation that really got me thinking. I was at work and a friend asked what makes a person a bad person. I thought about it and my response was something to the effect of a person is bad probably when they have given up on trying to be good. Not just that they are lost, but more they have been lost for so long that their destructive habits have become a destructive lifestyle and they have no desire to do good or perhaps not even the awareness of good anymore. When you really think on it, if you care about people at all, you will find it very difficult to perceive anyone as being bad. This friend and I discussed this briefly and for most of the remainder of that day, I began wondering what defines a person as good and whether or not I am a good person. There is a very vast range of subtopics that could be explored in this, but ultimately, I came up with a basic understanding that I would like to attempt to share. I believe that we are all born good. As we are raised and we grow, we become our own selves and we are all given various trials and circumstances that will severely test us. During these trials, we will certainly and without exception fail on more than one occasion. We are human. What really makes the difference, I believe, is how you react to your failures. (When I say failure, I am not only focusing on sins of the religious, I refer to any failure on any scale in life, whether you believe in God or not.) If you allow a failure to dishearten you, and to hurt you, and to bring you down, you will most certainly gain nothing and could eventually lose something else. With each failure after, you slowly and slowly fall, until at some point, with your values long gone, your faith only a whisper of a memory, and your true self lost, you turn to those destructive habits and in the end, a destructive lifestyle wherein you may harm yourself or others. However, if you encounter a failure and you seek to learn from it, to better yourself and others from that experience, and to put in place actions that prevent failure in that regard again, you grow. As you continuously look to better yourself and others, you form beneficial habits that lead to a life of service, love, care, and ultimately, goodness. You can try to break down the levels of goodness all day long, but I contend that there should be no levels you seek to attain, but rather work to become the absolute best you can. You will always find areas to improve on.

Being good is something we have to be proactive at. I frequently ask myself "Have I done any good today?" Did I hold a door open for someone, did I visit a friend, did I drive someone somewhere, did I apologize for something I did or said that I should not have? I have mentioned before and I will mention again that my friends (and family) are the center of my life. The experiences I share with them, the memories we create, the meals we share, the service they allow me to give to them are the focal point and very source of my happiness. I was absolutely serious when I said I would give up all of my possessions to gain a lost friend back. My favorite part from a song I have shared a couple times here:

Say what you will, but the time that we fill
while we're on the earth
should not be alone, we were meant to be known
and you make me what I'm worth.

I know that I have an enormous amount of learning and growing to do. There are very few, if any things I claim to really know. I have ideas on how the world works and I put forth efforts with those ideas. Sometimes I do ok, but more often than not I fail. But I have a desire to be good. I have a desire to keep learning, to keep failing, to keep growing and I will continue to do so until I either die or that day of judgement finally comes...though if I am in Utah, someone call me and let me know so I don't miss it.

Song of the Day is "The Climb" by Miley Cyrus....haters gonna hate, but the lyrics are perfectly appropriate for today's post...

Going back to school this time around is a little more difficult. Last time I had savings and I just paid tuition right out of my pocket and lived very comfortably within my means with my part-time job. This time, I work full-time and I still had to incur student loans.

 Honestly, I'm not very pleased with myself.

I know how much money I made last year. A little over half of that went to cost of living, but that still leaves a substantial amount unaccounted for. If you break it down, in theory, I should have been able to pay off my debts, save money, and still live comfortably within my means and have plenty to enjoy nights out. Yet, somehow my debts increased.

I might as well come out and admit what my debts are. I think the humiliation of admitting it will help me cut off ALL non-vital expenditures and enable me to pay it off quick. The certain rebuke from home will probably also assist. The total in unsecured debt (unsecured meaning personal lines of credit and such) as of today is $2362.51.

Two thousand three hundred sixty-two dollars and fifty-one cents.

Most of that is in my car. A big chunk went into taxes last year. Really only a couple hundred has been spent on things I don't need, but because I did not pay off the big price emergency things like the car repair and the tax bill, when I would go out or buy something, that money should have gone into reducing the deficit. Therein lies my main problem. I feel my spending can certainly be reduced, but I definitely do not go out and blow all my money on shopping sprees. As I mentioned before, most of the things I have I have had for many years. The most I really spent in a shopping spree was when I bought 4 long sleeve shirts for between $6 and $8 each, and since the temperature has been below zero for about 90% of the winter, that was a good investment.

The only way to really handle this is to stop spending altogether. Every penny I have that does not go into monthly obligations needs to go into reducing my deficit. There is a very real pressure that comes with any amount of debt. Having a debt increases my stress levels. No matter how much I may say my finances are in good order, they are not and that effects every other facet of my life. It is hard to focus on other things when you are constantly nagged by your own irresponsibility.

Time to institute a serious course of action.

Song of the Day is "If I Had a Million Dollars" 

If you ever thought you were alone in life, say an honest prayer. Yesterday was a sucky day and as I was struggling through it before bed, I knew I needed some help, so I paused and prayed.

This morning, I was heading out to school. I went to the stadium parking lot to catch the shuttle up to campus. As usual, this time of day was jam packed. Two buses that go two different ways up came, but both were full. One I was even on, but the driver was more strict on rules and would not let us stack the front, so we had to exit and wait for the next one. I wanted the bus that went closer to my class, but a bus heading to the other side of campus came and could squeeze one more person on, so, despite the extra 5 minutes of walking on campus, I opted to take it. Up on campus, I disembarked and began the walk to my class. There are about 20,000 students at Utah State. I ran into the one student in the masses that could put a smile on my face.

Taylor Smith, my awesome friend from down at the resort.

 It has been almost a year since I have seen her and many months since I have talked to her, though I have often thought of her and wondered what she was up to. She was excited to see me as well and while we only had a minute to say hi, we are going to meet up later this week and catch up.

Seeing an old friend was a great surprise and definitely made my day.

I have always been good about taking care of my personal belongings so they last a long time. I got my first phone in 2006 and did not replace it until 2012. I replaced it mostly to get a new service. The phone still worked. I got my first laptop in 2007. I did not need to replace it until the end of 2011. Once again, the laptop still worked, but it was out of date and I had little choice but to update. I have had the same church shoes since I was a junior in high school. As I look around my room, many of the items I see I have owned for many years. It is important to take care of the things that I have.

I'm not really sure where I am going with this.

I lost my best friend. She doesn't want any more to do with me. She doesn't want to talk to me. She doesn't want to see me. She doesn't want to think about me. She wants to forget everything about me. I have never had a friend who meant so much to me. I would give up all of my precious belongings to save this friendship. I would give up my laptop, I would give up my phone, I would give up my theater, I would give up my shoes, I would give up my games, I would give up my money.

 If I could have this friendship back, I would give up everything I have, and I would be content.

My heart is not filled by the physical things. I have been blessed with many physical things to make my life enjoyable, yet still my heart is empty.

 Each life that touches ours for good

    Reflects thine own great mercy, Lord;

    Thou sendest blessings from above

    Thru words and deeds of those who love.

   

What greater gift dost thou bestow,

    What greater goodness can we know

    Than Christlike friends, whose gentle ways

    Strengthen our faith, enrich our days.

   

When such a friend from us departs,

    We hold forever in our hearts

    A sweet and hallowed memory,

    Bringing us nearer, Lord, to thee.

   

 For worthy friends whose lives proclaim

    Devotion to the Savior's name,

    Who bless our days with peace and love,

    We praise thy goodness, Lord, above.

Come on, come on
You have got to move on
This is not the you i know
This isn't real
It's just all you can feel
And that's the way that feelings go
And whether or not it's right or wrong you'll do what you will do

When the cloud in the sky starts to pour
And your life is just a storm you're braving
Don't tell yourself you can't lean on someone else
Cause we all need saving sometimes

Say what you will but the time that we fill
While we're on the earth
Should not be alone
We were meant to be known
You make me what I'm worth
But I can't keep you from yourself you'll do what you will do

When the cloud in the sky starts to pour
And your life is just a storm you're braving
Don't tell yourself you can't lean on someone else
Cause we all need saving sometimes

I don't know why it has to be this way and
I don't know the cure
But please believe someone has felt this way before

When the cloud in the sky starts to pour
And your life is just a storm you're braving
Don't tell yourself you can't lean on someone else
Cause we all need saving sometimes...